Wilson Phillips’ Carnie Wilson Okay With Being Fat

Album Picture for Wilson Phillips' Debut

I think I was a sophomore in high school the first time I saw Wilson Phillips on MTV and, like pretty much everyone else, I couldn’t help but notice “the fat one.”  A couple of things happened pretty quickly, however, to change my impression.  Well, not of Carnie Wilson’s obese status, obviously.

First, I became really good friends with a girl who was pretty much obsessed with the band.  Like, we’d sit in her room and listen to Wilson Phillips (which we affectionately referred to as “Philson Willips” … how veddy sophomoric) all the time.  The other thing was that I was taking private voice lessons, and I developed a great appreciation for the role of harmony in vocal music.

It didn’t take me long to realize that Carnie …

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Spike TV Lists “7 Cutest Feminists”

Picture of Spike Logo
So Spike has complied a list of their interpretation of the seven cutest feminists, and I’m not sure whether to be offended or amused. I mean, this is of course the channel best known for all manner of wrestling (which, like NASCAR, is somehow considered a sport … kind of) and CSI reruns.

That said, though, I do find their choices kind of interesting. And funny. And a little bit insulting.

Anyway, from Spike, “The Top Seven Cutest Feminists”:

#7: Jennifer Baumgardner

Like most bi-sexual writers from Fargo, North Dakota, Jennifer Baumgardner has had a storied literary career focused on political equity, feminist rights, and a long-term sexual relationship with a founding member of The Indigo Girls.

Yup, the author of works such as Young Women, Feminism and the Future and Look Both Ways: Bisexual Politics should definitely be known for bedding an Indigo Girl. And being cute. That’s huge.

#6: Kat Banyard

Author of The Equality Illusion and director of UK Feminista, Banyard has spent the majority of her professional life furthering the feminist cause and ensuring that women throughout England enjoy the same rights as their mildly effeminate male counterparts. (Which, judging by their national soccer team, includes the procurement of disease-free prostitutes and struggling to stay competitive in World Cup matches with Germany.)

Ouch, Spike, just … ouch.

#5: Kirsten Gillibrand (although Spike misidentifies her as “Kristen” Gillibrand)

The former Asian studies major and current New York senator is a self-described feminist who has worked tirelessly to occasionally fight for women’s rights in various political forums. During an interview with Womensrights.change.org, the former sorority girl turned tobacco defender claimed that “we’ve reached a point where women really can get elected at the highest levels of government all over the country” and “I have no doubt that we will see more women in elected office in the coming years.” (She also listed “bad breath” and “male flight attendants” as her turn-offs later in the article.)

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Did Bozo Clown Around on His Wife (And Does it Matter)?

There’s something kind of laughable about a fame whore. I don’t know when it became the norm for people who have been connected in some way, shape, or form to a celebrity to kiss and tell in the form of books that no doubt got them big advances, but I think it’s really pretty pathetic in a comical kind of way.

Children’s television icon Bozo the Clown, aka Larry Harmon, died in 2008 shortly after finishing a memoir of a very interesting life. This piece was posthumously published as The Man Behind the Nose and includes tales of a guy who “was a professional clown, ran for President, bonded with dangerous cannibal tribes in New Guinea, and was saved from being swallowed whole by a murderous python in Thailand by his 83 AAA shoes.”

In addition to these feats, Bozo faced divorce court four times … and Sandra Harmon is evidently going out of her way to make sure that she is the most memorable of the bunch who squeezed Bozo’s nose in the name of holy matrimony.

Harmon, perhaps best known for co-writing Elvis & Me with Priscilla Presley, has also written a couple of books about relationships … and now she’s spilling the beans on her marriage to Bozo—including …

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Do You Care that Montana Fishburne Is a Porn Star?

In case you haven’t heard, Montana Fishburne, who is the somewhat-wayward daughter of acclaimed actor Laurence Fishburne, has unabashedly decided to dive into the adult film industry. The sagacious 19-year-old has claimed that she is not doing it for any publicity stunt, but rather that this is something she has “always wanted.” I’m going to explicitly ignore the fact that her pseudonym is “Chippy D” (I’m honestly not even sure where to start with that one), and discuss another aspect of this development in her career.

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