The Truth Behind the Hefner/Harris Wedding

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I grew up thinking Playboy was no big deal. My mother grew up in L.A. and was invited several times to spend movie nights at the mansion since her friend’s mother was a playmate. When “The Girls Next Door” came on E!, I loved every minute of it. Holly was by far my favorite. For some reason that show made Hugh Hefner’s lifestyle seem normal, almost tame. Yeah, there were three girls living with him that he called his “girlfriends,” but come on. Obviously Hugh Hefner is not really dating seven girls, or even three. I’m about to drop some knowledge on you people.

Hugh Hefner pays girls to live with him and be his “girlfriends.” Shocking, I know. If you watched Holly Madison’s E! True Hollywood Story you already had a glimpse of this. In that special, they discuss how Holly was lead girl and how Hef would want to have sex with Bridgette or Kendra but both girls felt strange about it and tried to avoid it. During Kendra’s E! True Hollywood Story it was revealed that she was dating Hank Baskett while living at the mansion as a “girlfriend.” It’s fake, people. It’s all fake. They get a salary, they have to abide by certain rules, and it is a business deal.

In 2011, Hugh Hefner, then 85, announced that he was engaged to Crystal Harris, then 25. When this happened I was appalled, not at the fact that an 85-year-old was going to marry a 25-year-old, but that he didn’t propose to Holly. I mean, she was there for love—we can all agree on that. That girl put in five years; they even tried fertility treatments together. Yeah, they did. Holly really wanted babies and so they tried IVF but unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) it didn’t take. That’s when Holly realized that she wasn’t going to get marriage or babies from Hef and moved on. But he didn’t even propose during the IVF treatment, and honestly, that’s kind of shitty, Hef. You don’t propose to the girl that is doing fertility treatments so that your old ass sperm can live in that bangin’ body, the one that’s been there for five years, but you propose to Crystal Harris after a year? Come on! Anyway, the wedding plans began and then Crystal called off the marriage the day before the nuptials. She was dubbed the “runaway bride.” That never would’ve happened with Holly, I’m just saying.

Now it’s 2012 and the wedding is back on. Hugh Hefner and Crystal Harris are getting married; they even picked up their marriage license. I am so grossed out by this, and again not for the age reason. Back in November I was at a gathering and was talking to someone, we were talking about …

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The Star of that Other Other 60s Show Says It’s Not Sexist Either

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In last week’s Pan Am post, I failed to note that it wasn’t the only show seeking to ride the wave of Mad Men‘s 60s success. This fall will also see the start-up of The Playboy Club, which revolves around the patrons and bunnies at Chicago’s original Playboy Club. According to the show’s trailer, there will of course be plenty of murder, mayhem and broken hearts — which does make it slightly more intriguing than Pan Am‘s promise of humiliating weekly weigh-ins and the feminist freedom of being a sky waitress.

One thing that is notable about both of these shows is that, unlike Mad Men, they are pretty female-centric. Sure, Mad Men has Betty, Joan, Sally and Peggy, but almost all of the female characters are being showcased within a “man’s world.” While the Playboy Club and Pan Am certainly are about the ways in which these women had to alter themselves in order to please their male customers, many of the show’s scenes take place away from that, where the women talk amongst themselves in a kind of smaller “female sphere” within the larger male zones. That doesn’t make either of these shows un-sexist, necessarily, but it does give us — and the writers — a chance to break the habit of having female characters mostly responding to or talking about men.

With that said, Gloria Steinem, who has not seen The Playboy Club, saw fit to declare it sexist, saying:

“I hope people boycott it. It’s just not telling the truth about the era. I just know that over the years, women have called me and told me horror stories of what …

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The jokes about a politician named Weiner Tweeting pics of his package all over cyberspace practically write themselves, and, yeah, it’s funny as hell.  The underlying issue of the Weiner fiasco is not so funny, however.

In fact, it brings up a debate that has become increasingly common as social networking has become a way of life—namely, does cybersex fall under the “cheating” umbrella or is it on par with, say, porn?

Perhaps the biggest (I’m sorry, the puns are just unavoidable here, so bare bear with me) argument in favor of Weiner’s actions going beyond jerking off to Playboy pictorials is exemplified by his initial …

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Do You Need to Be a Lesbian to Make Good Lesbian Porn?

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Jincey Lumpkin (I’m assuming that’s not her real name, but awesome if it is) thinks so. And if not a lesbian, at least a woman. The self-proclaimed “Hugh Hefner of lesbian porn,” Lumpkin started the lesbian social networking site in 2008, and recently moved into creating lesbian porn on Juicy Pink Box notable for its absence of “gay for pay” sex. Though Hefner’s empire doesn’t call to mind anything much more than soft-core imagery most of the time, Lumpkin says:

“To me, Playboy is the brand that has really transcended pornography and has represented an enviable lifestyle.”

She aims to become just as powerful for women who like women, and on some level, make that lifestyle equally ubiquitous. Lumpkin believes …

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