New List of Beach Dangers That Aren’t Exactly New

Photo of a Beach

With temperatures flying into the 80s and 90s, humidity creeping oppressively upward, and the sun flexing its muscles as it beats down relentlessly, there is no question that summer has arrived in earnest. While the Fourth of July has come and gone, there are still a lot of warm days left for those who love summer to enjoy.

And what better place to while away a summer day than the beach?

Although I live in a seacoast town and consider myself pretty well versed in potential seaside snafus such as sunburns and riptides, a recent Fox News article discussing so-called “beach bummers” caught my eye.

Most interesting to me is that media coverage of these potential dangers is minimal when compared to sun exposure and shark attacks … and contemplation of who the intended audience is.

Anyway, here are five beach dangers that might have slipped past you.

1. Food Poisoning

A bacterium called staphylococcus rapidly grows on mayonnaise, for example, that’s been left in the heat for too long. In an hour, this bacterium can attack your food and within four hours, it can cause severe vomiting and diarrhea, according to Dr. David A. Farcy, director of Emergency Department Critical Care at Mount Sinai Medical Center in Miami, Florida. To ensure your snacks and meals are safe, bring your food in a well-insulated cooler and pack plenty of ice.

I have a tendency to just avoid anything with mayonnaise on general principle when picnicking for a day. It just doesn’t seem worth the risk.

I had salmonella poisoning once, so I’m actually kind of paranoid about this, but sometimes the little things slip by you.

My younger daughter, a notoriously picky eater, had a summer camp field trip one day last week, and I sent her with a pizza Lunchable (and by confessing that am effectively removing my candidacy for mother …

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Forbes: 10 Most Powerful Women Authors

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Forbes.com recently posted a list of “The 10 Most Powerful Women Authors”, a list compiled specifically by Forbes Blogger, Avril David, who chose to include only living writers of fiction and personal narratives. The list is based not entirely on literary skill, nor is it confined to pop culture writers, instead, it focuses on the authors’ influence through her words.

Naturally, JK Rowling came in number one on the list. If this were a list of the best or most influential female writers, JK Rowling would be receiving much less appreciation. However, Rowling’s 450 million books sold, 8 movies about her books, and Harry Potter’s standing in …

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Spike TV Lists “7 Cutest Feminists”

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So Spike has complied a list of their interpretation of the seven cutest feminists, and I’m not sure whether to be offended or amused. I mean, this is of course the channel best known for all manner of wrestling (which, like NASCAR, is somehow considered a sport … kind of) and CSI reruns.

That said, though, I do find their choices kind of interesting. And funny. And a little bit insulting.

Anyway, from Spike, “The Top Seven Cutest Feminists”:

#7: Jennifer Baumgardner

Like most bi-sexual writers from Fargo, North Dakota, Jennifer Baumgardner has had a storied literary career focused on political equity, feminist rights, and a long-term sexual relationship with a founding member of The Indigo Girls.

Yup, the author of works such as Young Women, Feminism and the Future and Look Both Ways: Bisexual Politics should definitely be known for bedding an Indigo Girl. And being cute. That’s huge.

#6: Kat Banyard

Author of The Equality Illusion and director of UK Feminista, Banyard has spent the majority of her professional life furthering the feminist cause and ensuring that women throughout England enjoy the same rights as their mildly effeminate male counterparts. (Which, judging by their national soccer team, includes the procurement of disease-free prostitutes and struggling to stay competitive in World Cup matches with Germany.)

Ouch, Spike, just … ouch.

#5: Kirsten Gillibrand (although Spike misidentifies her as “Kristen” Gillibrand)

The former Asian studies major and current New York senator is a self-described feminist who has worked tirelessly to occasionally fight for women’s rights in various political forums. During an interview with Womensrights.change.org, the former sorority girl turned tobacco defender claimed that “we’ve reached a point where women really can get elected at the highest levels of government all over the country” and “I have no doubt that we will see more women in elected office in the coming years.” (She also listed “bad breath” and “male flight attendants” as her turn-offs later in the article.)

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Women’s Magazine Evidently Endorses Douching to Get a Raise

One would hope that advice coming from a magazine called Woman’s Day would be useful, relevant, and … well, not based in the days when women spent their days cooking, cleaning, and preparing their children to be clean and polite when Daddy got home from work. There’s a reason Valium is known as “Mother’s Little Helper,” you know?

But who’da thunk that, in 2010, a women’s magazine (geared toward women, just to drive that point home) would recommend douching as an effective career advancement step? What’s next, freaking labiaplasties?

Wow …

Yup, there’s a list of steps to take in preparation for asking for a raise. While eating a healthy breakfast, being sure to leave early the day you’re going to make the request to ensure you’re not late, and not letting the conversation stray are all there, the number one reason, available for viewing on The Daily Kos, is this:

It should start with your usual routine and all the things you do to feel your best including showering with Summer’s Eve Feminine Wash or throwing a packet of Summer’s Eve Feminine Cleansing Cloths into your bag for a quick freshness pick-me-up during the day.

Now, to be completely fair to Woman’s Day, this is clearly marked “Promotion” (read advertisement) for …

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