Why I Hate You, ‘Magic Mike’

photo of magic mike pictures
I know everyone is excited about “Magic Mike” but I’m not. Firstly, girls get to be hookers with the heart of gold, okay? Not boys. Boys don’t get to take that role from us, we originated that role and we do it better. But that’s not what bothers me about this movie.

I know that it’s based on Channing Tatum’s life, or whatever, but c’mon. I cannot count how many times I have heard girls screaming at their boyfriends for going to a strip club, watching porn, or buying Playboy. It’s always the same things being said too – “they’re trashy” or “those girls are such skanks,” etc. You know; things of that nature. But when Channing Tatum and his bros get up on stage to gyrate and bare their bodies it’s okay? Why?

This all came to a head for me when I saw the above photo.

Yeah, it matters. It matters what the movie is about because movies are about plots not abs. Movies about abs play on Cinemax after 10 pm. I don’t care that these guys have nice stomachs and can grind their hips, I’m not mad at them for getting up and grinding on stage. I’m mad at you, ladies.

That’s right – you. You hypocritical broads that will yell at a man for looking at your boobs before your eyes but will pay 28 bucks to see this film. This isn’t about everyone it’s about a select few. The above photo was posted on someone’s Facebook wall and I was then assaulted with it on my news feed. When I saw it I wanted to scream. This girl not only gave her boyfriend the silent treatment for buying a magazine with Kate Upton on it but has repeatedly told me that she thinks strippers are “disgusting whores on par with the trash that walks Hollywood Boulevard.” But she is counting down the days until she sees this flick. I’m confused.

I don’t know what it is that makes it okay for men to do things and horrible for women to do it. It’s the age old battle of double standards. Is it because men with washboard abs and the ability to dance are so rare? Is that why it’s okay to put them on a stage, rub oil on them, and make them dance for dollars? I don’t think so. I don’t think it’s ever okay. I’ve gone on my stripper rant before and my …

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‘Lovelace’: Bringing ‘Deep Throat’ Back to Life

photo of linda lovelace pictures photos
Amanda Seyfried is staring in a biopic of Linda Lovelace of ‘Deep Throat’ fame. I recently read an article that took issue with the newly-released movie poster. In it, the writer stated:

Amanda Seyfried, who plays Boreman/Lovelace, is shown in a traditionally alluring pose with her head angled at the camera, eyes come-hithery, a hint of cleavage, and her red lace bra strap and lace shawl falling off her bare shoulder. Light bounces off her brunette tangle, as if her halo slipped. Most egregiously, given the subject matter of “Deep Throat,” her plump pink lips are parted, though mercifully not in an “O.” The tagline “X marks the legend” is not reassuring.

It is your basic sexist movie ad, and there are have been far worse, but surely in this day and age a movie about the experiences of such a brutalized woman as Boreman daren’t suggest it can be sexy and amusing?

Well, it’s a movie about porn, so a sexy pose would be relevant to the topic, right? Furthermore, the sentence, “about the experiences of such a brutalized woman as Boreman daren’t suggest it can be be sexy and amusing,” I would have to answer this question with a resounding “No, it can’t be.” Of course a story about the horrors that Susan Boreman/Linda Lovelace endured can’t be portrayed as sexy or amusing. Gosh, what are we, barbarians?

This is not an empowering porn story, nor is it porn girl makes good. This is a story about a woman who gave so much power to men that she allowed them to run her life. The backstory is that while Susan Boreman was recovering from a car accident at her parents’ home, she met Chuck Traynor. Traynor convinced Boreman to move to New York and get into porn where she became known as Linda Lovelace. Susan, now Linda, started out performing in short “loop” films, did a bestiality film, and eventually did the porn film ‘Deep Throat’, which coined her as a bona fide porn actress.

The reason she’s famous is that Deep Throat went mainstream, even receiving a review in the New York Times. She’s also famed for performing the title act, having a fully shaved pubic area, and engaging in anal sex—all of which was very rare and taboo in porn at the time. She eventually left porn after producer/choreographer David Winters convinced her to, and once again, another man made her decisions for her. She eventually joined the feminist “anti-porn” movement, which wasn’t all that surprising, ultimately, considering the issues she’d had.

Lovelace had a history of drug abuse and was clearly used and abused by men. The synopsis for the film, “LOVELACE” is as follows:

Story of Linda Lovelace, who is used and abused by the porn industry at the behest of her coercive husband, before taking control of her life.

But I would argue that every woman who entered porn in the 70’s was used and abused by the industry. Porn was not pro-women until recently. I’d say, within the last decade or so, porn has become an industry that is run by women and controlled by women. The bottom line? If you’re looking to tell a feminist story, don’t tell one about a 1970’s porn star who clearly needed help that she was not given, and if you are going to tell that story, kindly remind the audience that this girl is not a feminist icon and should not be perceived as such … even in a movie poster.



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New “Twilight” Movie, New Conversations About Sexuality

Book Cover of "Seduced by Twilight" by Natalie Wilson
Every time a new movie adaptation of Stephenie Meyer’s truly dreadful books comes out, conversations about sex and vampires and Bella’s pathetic characterization regarding the portrayal of females in literature and film seem to pop up everywhere.

Consider this a token response to Breaking Dawn (subtitled Breaking Bella).

Natalie Wilson recently wrote a book entitled Seduced by Twilight, which touches on many of the very legitimate concerns the series raises, an excerpt of which was run on Women’s Enews.  Wilson attempts to “explore the contradictory messages of Twilight, a series that presents neither a subversive nor a conservative view of larger social contexts, but is an ambiguous mixture of both.”

Right on, Natalie Wilson!

From Women’s Enews:

Most of the messages in the saga are rather old-fashioned, encouraging the largely female fan base to head back to the kitchen. The series speaks for the likes of Glenn Beck, who told Sarah Palin to “make him some stew.” Yet, some of the textual strands are transgressive, suggesting that religious and cultural mores of sexuality and gender are too strict. Others …

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Is Bemoaning the Lack of Fictional Female Mentors Taking Feminism Too Far?

Picture of One Woman Mentoring Another

Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction.

Sometimes, though, it’s … well, not.

In fact, much of the time life sort of goes along in a way that could almost be considered typical.  Stereotypical, even, odd as that sounds.

When I first read a recent piece on Jezebel lamenting the lack of strong female mentor characters, I was totally on board.  The fact that fictional mentors for young women are frequently power-hungry super bitches, arrogant (and, naturally, handsome) men, or “real characters” that often happen to be flamboyantly homosexual is inarguable.

That being said, though … so the hell what?

I am a voracious reader.  Sometimes, in fact, I think I need a 12-step program for my addiction to literature.  I also love movies.

Why?

Because it allows me to escape from my own life, to gain perspective, to think about other things.

If somebody made a movie about my life, it’d be pretty freaking boring.  And I have female mentors, several of them in fact.  Furthermore, they are real characters.

  • One of my teaching mentors has an obsession with Def Leppard that has led to tattoos in odd locations and guitar picks displayed in glass boxes on the mantle.
  • One of my life mentors recently sent me a picture of a shell she found on the beach shaped like a penis in a desperate attempt to get me to fly to North Carolina for Thanksgiving.
  • One of my writing mentors is … well, the inimitable Sarah Taylor-Spangenberg, which speaks for itself.
  • One of my motherhood mentors told me once that plastic Solo cups are the best way to keep your kids from knowing what you’re drinking.

And so on.

These are, all four and many more that I’m not bringing up, incredibly strong woman that I …

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