Tag Archives: equality

My Feminism, and Perhaps Yours

Posted on by
Reply

Nowadays, it seems that declaring oneself to be a feminist is a form of coming out of the closet. Celebrities, such as Beyonce or Katy Perry are occasionally questioned to whether they fall into the feminist list.

Upon admitting said feminism, it seems necessary to clarify what type, telling the world “I’m not a bra-burner, I don’t hate men, I still shave my pits, please forgive me!” Forget the stereotypes and pay attention to the powerful women who make change happen- and sometimes end up making millions.

Beyonce questioned “Why do you have to choose what type of woman you are? Why do you have to label yourself anything?” Well, no, you do not have to label yourself. Going back to the stereotypes we pretend to ignore, you do not have to be a women to be a feminist. Today’s modern form of feminism tends to cite the idea of equal rights. If you believe in equal rights regardless of gender, race, socioeconomic status, and the like- then you are a feminist. I don’t care if you have a penis.

Having legal equal rights does not mean that people must continuously defy gender norms and choose according to what will be perceived as feministic. We are also not living in a fake Ayn Rand society where complete equality is forced upon us. The importance is that we have the equal rights to choose how we live our lives.

Once, I was asked by a guy I liked if I was a feminist. It seemed almost accusatory. I was afraid to answer, wondering if he would still be attracted to me. Another time, I was told that I am not a feminist due to how they perceived my actions. This is my feminism, not yours. Join the fight or shut up.



You Might Also Like ...

The Truth Behind the Hefner/Harris Wedding

Posted on by
Reply

photo of hugh hefner and crystal harris pictures
I grew up thinking Playboy was no big deal. My mother grew up in L.A. and was invited several times to spend movie nights at the mansion since her friend’s mother was a playmate. When “The Girls Next Door” came on E!, I loved every minute of it. Holly was by far my favorite. For some reason that show made Hugh Hefner’s lifestyle seem normal, almost tame. Yeah, there were three girls living with him that he called his “girlfriends,” but come on. Obviously Hugh Hefner is not really dating seven girls, or even three. I’m about to drop some knowledge on you people.

Hugh Hefner pays girls to live with him and be his “girlfriends.” Shocking, I know. If you watched Holly Madison’s E! True Hollywood Story you already had a glimpse of this. In that special, they discuss how Holly was lead girl and how Hef would want to have sex with Bridgette or Kendra but both girls felt strange about it and tried to avoid it. During Kendra’s E! True Hollywood Story it was revealed that she was dating Hank Baskett while living at the mansion as a “girlfriend.” It’s fake, people. It’s all fake. They get a salary, they have to abide by certain rules, and it is a business deal.

In 2011, Hugh Hefner, then 85, announced that he was engaged to Crystal Harris, then 25. When this happened I was appalled, not at the fact that an 85-year-old was going to marry a 25-year-old, but that he didn’t propose to Holly. I mean, she was there for love—we can all agree on that. That girl put in five years; they even tried fertility treatments together. Yeah, they did. Holly really wanted babies and so they tried IVF but unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) it didn’t take. That’s when Holly realized that she wasn’t going to get marriage or babies from Hef and moved on. But he didn’t even propose during the IVF treatment, and honestly, that’s kind of shitty, Hef. You don’t propose to the girl that is doing fertility treatments so that your old ass sperm can live in that bangin’ body, the one that’s been there for five years, but you propose to Crystal Harris after a year? Come on! Anyway, the wedding plans began and then Crystal called off the marriage the day before the nuptials. She was dubbed the “runaway bride.” That never would’ve happened with Holly, I’m just saying.

Now it’s 2012 and the wedding is back on. Hugh Hefner and Crystal Harris are getting married; they even picked up their marriage license. I am so grossed out by this, and again not for the age reason. Back in November I was at a gathering and was talking to someone, we were talking about …

Continue reading →



You Might Also Like ...

Gay Student Gets Vandalized Car Fixed Gratis

Posted on by
2

photo of jordan addison pictures
I’m a girl. I’m a skinny, not completely hideous, girl. I have been subjected to horrible slurs, discrimination, and shady situations. I have been told I’m not smart, not worth anything unless I’m lying down, and that I should just “sit there and look pretty.” I’ve lost male friends because their girlfriends didn’t want them around me because they didn’t “understand” how we could just “be friends.” I know what it feels like to be regulated to one thing, and I know what it feels like to have people judge you and be threatened by you and wish you ill will because of one thing. Due to these experiences, I have a pretty hard time when people tell me I’m pretty. I always correct them with “I’m smart.” I just don’t want to be one thing. And I don’t want that one thing to take anything else away from me. Maybe that’s why I feel so strongly and work so hard for equal rights. It’s why I’m a feminist and it’s why I strongly support equality for all.

There’s a joke in my family that I can’t process normal human emotions. I give all my love and attention to animals and “the underdogs.” If I see a kid with glasses and an inhaler I’ll immediately well up—no matter what the situation. I don’t like bullies and I don’t stand by and watch it happen. I can’t. I can’t understand dehumanizing someone—mainly because I’ve felt it and I’d never wish that on anyone. So when a story like the one I’m about to tell you comes around, I tend to get really involved.

Jordan Addison is a college student in Virginia. He has a long history of being bullied, and has been assaulted quite often for being gay. Addison’s car has been vandalized four times and covered in gay slurs and hate speech each and every time. “The first time, there were some homophobic slurs keyed into the side of it. Then the second time I had die keyed into it,” said Addison.

When word got out about this latest assault on Addison, a local repair shop took action. The employees at Quality Auto Paint and Body in Roanoke asked 10 other businesses to donate and help them repair Addison’s car for free. Richard Henegar Jr., the manager of the repair shop, headed the project. “Once I saw the vandalism that was done to it, I said ‘That’s uncalled for. We’re gonna fix your car’. That’s the least we can do,” said Henegar.

The employees put in over 100 hours of work on the car. They put on new tires, a new paint job, tinted windows, a security system, and a new stereo. Altogether the car makeover came to over $10,000, which was all taken care of by the charity of other businesses and Quality Auto Paint and Body themselves. To see people coming together and standing up for what’s right and embracing someone … it really makes you stop and think.

I took this story to mean that change is possible, and this story made me feel like we’re moving in the right direction. We’re winning the fight, or at least starting to take an edge over on the other side, and that’s encouraging, if you ask me.



You Might Also Like ...

I’m Going Solo (Or; Why I’m ‘Done’ With Feminists)

Posted on by
3

photo of mahatma gandhi pictures
I was going to write a piece about “what’s changed for women,” but in doing the research I was reminded that nothing has changed. Female M.B.A’s still make $4,600 less than their male counterparts, and the depressing statistics just go on and on. I don’t need to spout them here, because they’ve already been talked to death as it were.

You know, I’ve spent a lot of time trying to rally the troops to get feminism up and running (guys, these articles don’t write themselves). Now I’m starting to think that maybe I don’t need the rest of you. That’s right, I said it. I don’t need you guys to be feminist and I don’t need anybody to help propel feminism forward. I can do it all on my own.

I recently read in an article that “… no woman [I] know would unapologetically describe herself as a feminist.” Feminism is something dirty, denigrated—to be looked upon with scorn. If, in the modern culture, gender equality does come up, the response is simply: ‘I’m not a feminist, but—’ (Translation: Please don’t think I’m a man-hater/ugly/being difficult!) It’s true and I’m guilty of it too. No one can accuse me of caring what people think. I make terrible life decisions over and over and don’t care what people say about them and I am far too blunt when asked for my opinion, but when I tell people I write for Zelda Lily I always say, “They’re a feminist blog but not like man-hating feminism.” Why do I clarify that? Why do I feel the apparent need to specify this? Who cares if they are man-hating? It’s not like men haven’t given us a reason to have an issue with them. What do I care if someone thinks I hate men?

This could be my exhaustion, depression, or overall constant anxiety talking but I think I’m done making excuses for feminists. I will stand up and say unapologetically that I am a feminist, and if you think that makes me a man-hater, ugly, or difficult … well, that’s fine with me because if that’s what a feminist is to you—then I don’t want to know you anyway. I’m done waiting on the movement. I’m taking a page from Gandhi and I’m going to be the change I want to see in the world.

Et tu?



You Might Also Like ...