Dirty Mind, Clean Company: Pussy Energy Drinks?

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Jonnie Shearer loves Pussy. I say that because Shearer has an energy drink company called … well, Pussy. See what he did there? He was clever and took a shocking name that can be punny and named his company after it. Sound familiar? Well this is Virgin territory. Get it?! Richard Branson did the same thing in 1970 but was a bit classier about it. Go figure.

Apparently, Shearer was in college deciding what to do with his life and was admiring Branson when he “came up” with the name. Came up with the name—not the company. Just had a brain child of “I’m gonna get a company and call it pussy cause who doesn’t love pussy?”. I take that as; he saw what Branson did and decided he was going to do it too—but did it much worse.

Shearer saw that energy drinks were a huge market but, “The existing drinks tasted awful, and I couldn’t pronounce half their ingredients. Since people were becoming more interested in healthy eating, I decided to come up with a natural energy drink.” So he decided to make Pussy something you can ingest that’s healthy. Basically, Shearer made Pussy good for you.

The next step was getting investors. Through a friend Shearer met Holly Branson, daughter of Richard Branson, and got her to like Pussy, then she got her brother to like Pussy and they invested in the company. Now Pussy is providing something yummy and natural that boosts spirits for several companies to sell and Shearer has an estimated net worth of 16 million dollars.

I guess you could say Shearer’s Pussy is revolutionizing what we put in our mouths! Advertising has been a bit of a problem for the company, for some reason cities don’t like having Pussy on billboards over their freeways. But if according to the companies tagline it’s not their problem. Pussy: “The drink’s pure, it’s your mind that’s the problem.”

Yeah….that’s it, it’s our minds that are the problem.



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The ‘Axe Strip Toilette’ is Pretty Repulsive – Even for a Toilet

Got to love viral advertising, especially sexist viral advertising that demeans women, the “sanctity” of monogamous relationships, and the avoidance of STDs all rolled up in one tight little package. Here’s what an Argentinian Axe commercial had to say to its consumers (which are probably all women buying little pick-me-ups at drugstores for their male significant others):

Last September 24th, it was Boyfriend’s Day.
What does Axe have to say to boyfriends?
Hey, dude. There’s nothing to celebrate.
We know you want to be with all of them, except with the one you’re with.
That’s why we set up some secret installation in the men’s room and gave them 5 minutes of singledom.
Welcome to the Axe Strip Toilette.
This is just a way of reminding guys that they are “castrating themselves” by limiting the power of the Axe effect to just one girl.

[Couple at the end of the clip]
Girl: What took you so long?
Guy: The restroom was a mess.
Girl: Oh, sorry to hear that.

So the lesson learned here, folks, is that your man is actually pretty bored with you and has nothing better to do than sit and look at your face day after day after day and it’s because he’s doing you a favor, you lucky bitch, you. Got that? No, but seriously, the thing that got me the most about this dumb ad was not that there were (gasp!) strippers hanging out in the loo, it was that one line of “We know you want to be with all of them, except with the one you’re with.” That pretty much put the icing on the cake.

Now if men only knew what we women were actually thinking when we went to the bathrooms and there were huffing, puffing, pole-grinding male strippers in there, giving us fashion advice and a shoulder to cry on, right? Boo hoo.



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MTV’s Skins Under Fire for Being Child Pornography?

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Forget Jersey Shore: MTV is making moves to be the hottest and most scandalous channel out there, with their new show Skins, adapted from the British show by the same name. Hot, young, fresh-faced stars? Check. Lots of sex, drugs and rock ‘n roll? Check. Facing huge criticism from the Parents Television Council? Check. They are the new CW, and this is their Gossip Girl. But have they gone too far? MTV is now facing potential charges that their show might fall under the category of child pornography, due to the sexually explicit scenes it features with underage actors. This week, top executives have been scrambling to deal with the potential fallout of this claim, and wondering “who could possibly face criminal prosecution and jail time if the episodes were broadcast without changes.” Taco Bell, Wrigley, GM, and H&R Block have

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The Superbowl Ad Preview: Serving Up More of the Same

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We’ve gotten a preview of some of the ads the Superbowl will bring us this year (Sunday, February 6, 2011, mark your calendars), and it’s not looking great. Some of the most expensive commercials of all time will feature Kim Kardashian in a Sketchers ad, Faith Hill for Teleflora, and Danica Patrick and Jillian Michaels for GoDaddy. What do all these women have in common? At least a few of them are going to be very provocative.

First, we have Kim Kardashian. What we have to look forward to, according to her, is “a very provocative ad.” Kardashian will be working out in Sketchers gear, but breaking up with someone at the same time. That’s what I call multitasking. Kim tells us that when she was filming it, “There was a lot of sweat making this ad. It gets a little slippery.” Incredibly original, seeing some sexy lady rolling around in jello, or …

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