Back in May, someone I knew was all excited that they were helping a charity. It was the Alzheimer’s Association and he was coaching their first annual Blondes vs. Brunettes charity football game. I immediately became offended. First off, football causes brain injuries and has been linked to both Alzheimer’s and dementia, so right up front this is a fail. It’s like promoting cancer awareness and prevention in a smoky bar. Second, why is a man coaching women who are pitted against each other based on hair color? Why is this happening?
His defense, when I called this event grotesque and sexist, was “It’s being put on by women” (so, so much shame when I heard this) and “It’s not like they’re playing in lingerie.” He, of course, was referring to the Lingerie Bowl, the annual event that happens during Super Bowl season wherein girls wear bras and panties and run around playing football.
Don’t get me wrong—I love football. LOVE IT. I am almost fanatical about the sport. I’ll play it in a backyard, I’ll yell at teams that I feel play it wrong, but I have never played on a team and here’s why: I know I am not built for the game of football. I am 5’5 and 103 lbs on a good day, and I have no business playing that game … I could die. So it irritates me to no end when girls in knickers and helmets go out on the field and “play football.” You cannot play this game in your underwear … you’re doing it wrong.
Naturally, everyone gave me a hard time on my stance saying, “Oh it’s all in good fun,” but finally I have government officials on my side! Last month Australia’s Minister for Sport made a public statement on the website Mamamia. She called the Lingerie Bowl ”cheap titillation,” ascended to ”degrading perv,” and that ”lingerie football” was an affront to all women.”
Yeah, that’s right—now it’s not just me saying that the Lingerie Bowl and Blonde vs. Brunettes Flag Football is sexist: it’s a Minister of Sport, too. Her whole job is to know this stuff. As for me, I have never felt so vindicated. But hey. Maybe we’re both wrong. Maybe it’s taken too personally. What are your thoughts?