I’m Sick of Teachers Banging Their Students

I used to work at a content aggregation site, which that means I would sit on the Internet and find lists of things then repurpose them for our site. I’m not proud of it, but every once in a while we’d come up with an original idea and make a list all our own. Surprising, right? Anyway, one day we made a list of the hottest teachers caught sleeping with their students. The list is currently at 51 teachers. I bring this up because yet another young, attractive female teacher has been caught having an affair with one of her high school students. This got me thinking—what the f*#k?
I understand an older male high school teacher, or even an early twenties male high school teacher having some attraction to his students. Let me explain, I do not think it’s okay for high school teachers to hook up with students but I do understand a man in his early twenties having an attraction to high school girls. High school girls look like they’re in their twenties and most men don’t lose attraction when a girl isn’t intellectually on the same level as them. Men would see a young, supple, attractive girl and be sexually aroused that’s normal and biological. Women are a bit more complicated. I cannot understand a grown woman being attracted to a fifteen year old boy—even an eighteen year old boy. Actually, wait. No. That’s not entirely accurate. I can understand being attracted to an eighteen year old boy that you aren’t around for eight hours a day. Models, actors, singers … sure, they’re attractive with their ripped abs and strong Photoshopped jawlines, but most real eighteen year old boys are gross, immature, and annoying. Why would a twenty-three year old woman be attracted to that?

Moreover, why are there fifty-two known cases of women sneaking fifteen to eighteen year old boys into their homes—homes that they sometimes share with a husband—or their cars to have sex with them? Is an eighteen or fifteen year old that good in the sack? From my memory the answer is no, but then again I’ve never slept with a fifteen year old in my entire life. Seventeen and eighteen, I can vouch for, but not fifteen. What is it, anyway? It can’t be the “affair” aspect, because why wouldn’t you choose a co-worker? It must have some deep psychological root that no article has ever discussed. The articles always focus on the ages, the places, the details (oral, DNA on cushions, in the car, in the bed etc) and how attractive the woman is. I think this proves my theory that it’s hard to understand why an attractive woman, capable of getting with a man her own age, would choose a high school boy.

Maybe they had really great high school experiences and want to relieve it, or maybe they had really bad experiences and want to live a different version of it—but how do you reconcile doing that when you’re twenty-three? Or thirty-one? What is the draw? I couldn’t wait to get out of high school and always dated much older boys because the ones in high school were insufferable. My knickers never dropped for a high school boy. In fact I shudder when I think about the guys I did date when I was in high school, if I could wipe that from my history I would. Can some …

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It’s Not the Man It’s the Miniskirt

In Swaziland, which is in South Africa, they’re saying “It’s not the men, it’s the miniskirts that cause rape.”  Yup, they are enforcing an 1889 law against “immoral” dressing—aka miniskirts, low-rise jeans, or crop tops.  Police spokesperson Wendy Hlelta said, “We do not encourage that women should be harmed, but at the same time people should note acceptable conduct of behavior. The act of the rapist is made easy because it would be easy to remove the half-cloth worn by the women. I have read from the social networks that men and even other women have a tendency of ‘undressing people with their eyes’. That becomes easier when the clothes are hugging or are more revealing.”

Right, because rapists don’t attack women in mom jeans. It’s the sexuality of the dress, it’s not the screwed up mindset of the man! Don’t you see? Women should learn how to “not get raped”—you don’t need to teach man to not rape.

To that end, women are also being instructed on how to bend over and pick things up properly:  “For females it is polite that when you have dropped something, squat with your upper body still upright and pick up the item rather than bending half your body head first to pick up the item.”

Don’t bend over or men will rape you!  And I thought America was behind in the progressive country movement. Hell, we might just be on par with a country you never heard of in South Africa.  This is insane, this is insulating and this is sad.

It’s not the miniskirt, it’s not the red lipstick, it’s not the CFM heels—it’s the man. I’ll even go one further, it’s the man the culture that protects him by blaming the woman. Enough.

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Review: The Invisible War

photo of the invisible war pictures
The documentary “The Invisible War” should be mandatory viewing for everyone currently living in the United States of voting age. “The Invisible War” talks about sexual assault in the U.S Military and the system that protects rapists and punishes victims. This documentary is disturbing it is heartbreaking it is disgusting. It is by far one of the most important documentaries that any American can see. This is happening to people that serve our country. This is happening to men and women who are willing to give their life for our freedom and we’re not protecting them.
Let me share a few facts from this documentary:
• Over 20% of female veterans are raped while serving.
• 47% of homeless female veterans have been raped while serving.
• 25% of servicewomen don’t report their rape because the person they would report it to is their rapist.
• Women who have been raped in the military have a PTSD rate higher than men that served in combat.
• The Army Criminal Investigation Division is told to treat victims like criminals and told to interrogate until you “got the truth out of her”.
• Air Force Security Police says rape cases were only given to men not women they were told women were too sympathetic and couldn’t see what was really going on because woman always take a woman’s side.
• 200,000 women in the military reported being sexually assaulted in 1991.
• 15% of incoming recruits have attempted or committed rape BEFORE entering the military.
• According to the Department of Defense 3,230 women and men reported assault 2009 the DOD admits that 80% of assault survivors do not report because of retaliation.
• Single women who report rape, if their rapist is married, will be charged with adultery.
• 1% of males had been victims of sexual assault in the last year that equals 20,000 men.
• In units where sexual harassment is tolerated rape rates triple.
• Most rapists in the military are heterosexual males.
• According to the DOD 3,223 active members reported being sexually assaulted, out of those only 175 did jail time in 2010.
• Sexual Assault Prevention and Response Office campaign slogan is “Don’t risk it…ask her when she’s sober”.
• In 2008 the Department of Defense instructed the Director of SAPRO to not testify before congress.
• The final decision in sexual assault cases in the military lies with Command. Not with legally trained experts.
• AN assailant was awarded the Air Force ‘Airman of the Year’ award during his victims rape investigation.
This documentary focuses on the fact that once a victim is raped they are raped again by the system. Watching this documentary I was blown …

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Still Not Asking For It

photo of topless still not asking for it pictures
I recently saw a picture online of a woman who, though her nipples were covered, was topless. Written on her torso were the words: “Still Not Asking For It.”

For years, I have been saying this, outraged. Usually during episodes of Law & Order. A woman can pole dance up and down a deserted street at midnight, clad only in a belt and . . . tassels . . . and she is no more or less asking to be sexually assaulted than a nun in a cloister.

Dancing, even if it involves grinding (what else is there? Ballroom dancing?), is not an invitation for sexual assault. Nor is it permission to have sex with you while you sleep.

The same goes for lap-dances. For being naked. For grooming yourself. For wearing a shirt that frames your figure. For wearing a top that exposes your cleavage. For leaving your door or window unlocked. For asking someone to help you to move something. For accepting a drink from a friend, a coworker, or even a stranger. For smiling at someone, or talking to someone. For existing. For going inside with him or inviting him into your place after a date. For each and every conceivable human activity on the planet that is not explicitly consenting to a given sexual activity, you are not “asking for” that given sexual activity.

Can we use the “house” analogy for a moment? Even though, obviously, while a burglary is a violent, traumatic, and intimate invasion, it does not really come close to a sexual assault.

Whether you let your lawn and your home’s exterior deteriorate and age like a neglected grandparent or you have a carefully manicured lawn and are fastidious about your home’s upkeep, you are not asking for your home to be burgled. Because . . . obviously. You just have a nice home and yard, you are proud of it, and want to show it off.

But there is more to it than that. Leaving your doors unlocked or a window open? That is not an invitation for a burglary. There are places where it is dangerous to do so, but you are still not inviting the danger. I think that most people understand that.

Unfortunately, society has a tendency to treat potential victims of sexual assault (that’s women and men, by the way) as the ones who need to do all of the work. As if avoiding sexual assault is like avoiding frostbite or mosquito bites.

That is not the case. Even if we ignore everyone who thinks that people are “too sensitive” about rape jokes, the pernicious lies that try to mitigate the culpability of rapists, or vicious attacks upon those who have been assaulted—as if it were possible for them to be at fault for someone else’s actions. Even if we ignore all of these elements that come together to form rape culture, there is still something severely wrong with a world in which we teach people to not get raped, but do not teach men to not rape.

That might sound absurd. I mean, I never had to be taught to not commit sexual assault. It should be obvious to everyone. But, since there are still rapists out there in the world, it is not. To a lot of people—people who operate in social circles in which survivors of sexual assault are very unlikely to report it or tell their friends and families, especially if the rape was committed by an acquaintance—rape is a hypothetical crime, like mugging. And surely there must be something that those targeted for sexual assault do to attract people. There must have been a misunderstanding.

There is not. The culpability lies with the assailant, and not with the victim. The culpability in crimes like this lies with the person who committed the rape. There are cases in which accomplices are also responsible, but ultimate responsibility belongs to the person who ignored the word “no” or never even allowed for an opportunity for an answer.

Unless they are literally asking for it, no one is “asking for it.” No matter what.

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