I’m Sick of Teachers Banging Their Students

I used to work at a content aggregation site, which that means I would sit on the Internet and find lists of things then repurpose them for our site. I’m not proud of it, but every once in a while we’d come up with an original idea and make a list all our own. Surprising, right? Anyway, one day we made a list of the hottest teachers caught sleeping with their students. The list is currently at 51 teachers. I bring this up because yet another young, attractive female teacher has been caught having an affair with one of her high school students. This got me thinking—what the f*#k?
I understand an older male high school teacher, or even an early twenties male high school teacher having some attraction to his students. Let me explain, I do not think it’s okay for high school teachers to hook up with students but I do understand a man in his early twenties having an attraction to high school girls. High school girls look like they’re in their twenties and most men don’t lose attraction when a girl isn’t intellectually on the same level as them. Men would see a young, supple, attractive girl and be sexually aroused that’s normal and biological. Women are a bit more complicated. I cannot understand a grown woman being attracted to a fifteen year old boy—even an eighteen year old boy. Actually, wait. No. That’s not entirely accurate. I can understand being attracted to an eighteen year old boy that you aren’t around for eight hours a day. Models, actors, singers … sure, they’re attractive with their ripped abs and strong Photoshopped jawlines, but most real eighteen year old boys are gross, immature, and annoying. Why would a twenty-three year old woman be attracted to that?

Moreover, why are there fifty-two known cases of women sneaking fifteen to eighteen year old boys into their homes—homes that they sometimes share with a husband—or their cars to have sex with them? Is an eighteen or fifteen year old that good in the sack? From my memory the answer is no, but then again I’ve never slept with a fifteen year old in my entire life. Seventeen and eighteen, I can vouch for, but not fifteen. What is it, anyway? It can’t be the “affair” aspect, because why wouldn’t you choose a co-worker? It must have some deep psychological root that no article has ever discussed. The articles always focus on the ages, the places, the details (oral, DNA on cushions, in the car, in the bed etc) and how attractive the woman is. I think this proves my theory that it’s hard to understand why an attractive woman, capable of getting with a man her own age, would choose a high school boy.

Maybe they had really great high school experiences and want to relieve it, or maybe they had really bad experiences and want to live a different version of it—but how do you reconcile doing that when you’re twenty-three? Or thirty-one? What is the draw? I couldn’t wait to get out of high school and always dated much older boys because the ones in high school were insufferable. My knickers never dropped for a high school boy. In fact I shudder when I think about the guys I did date when I was in high school, if I could wipe that from my history I would. Can some …

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