Boys are Yucky

Boys are gross. That’s a fact. They do gross things, and find gross things awesome. They can go four days without a shower and not notice. It’s gross. To further prove my point Reddit conducted a “what do you do” type poll and these are some of the results, none of which are shocking.

This is what men admit to doing on the toilet and my response to it:

“Pretend stream of piss is a power washer for removing the hard to get stains from the toilet.”- Why are there stains? Clean your toilet with real cleaning supplies or buy those blue things that hide them!

“Like most people, I pee in the shower. Unlike most people, I hold my penis upwards when I do it sometimes. It makes a really cool fountain.”- That is not “like most people”. You stand in urine. Then you spray urine up towards your face. Gross. So freaking gross.

“Tried to spit directly into your stream while pissing.”- WHY?!!?

“Flush mid piss and race the toilet.”- This I understand.

“I am quite confident that all men with a bathroom scale weigh themselves before and after they poop to see how much it weighed.”- So simple…men are so simple.

“When taking a piss make a circle with your fingers around the stream and try to make sure you don’t get on your hand.”- But you do get it on your hands…the pee sprays on your hands, disgusting.

“Take an epic dump so intense that you had to remove your shirt because it got so hot.”- It should not be such hard work…change your diet.

“Saw a turd in half with super-power piss-stream.” I can’t. I can’t even…how do you not gag? You know what…no…just…no.

This is what men admit to doing with their balls and my commentary:

“When your balls get stuck to your thighs in a public place, you open your legs as wide as possible without looking like a freak and let the balls slowly unstick. Best feeling.” “After you took a piss and a lil ballsack meat is stuck between your boxers and you just lift your leg like a dog who’s about to pee.” “Do a little leg kick mid walk in an attempt to unstick your balls from your leg.”- Three different ways unsticking your balls is amazing. You simple lovely creatures.

“Sit there and watch your ball sack move in and out by itself like some weird alien being. I can sit there and stare at it fluctuate for …

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Is Long Hair Seen as Crucial to Femininity?

photo of black bald woman with makeup and rhinestones
The UK’s Daily Mail featured an interesting piece earlier in the spring in which Rowena Kincaid, a breast cancer victim, described her feelings about, and displayed photographs of, losing her hair through chemotherapy. You can read the article here.

In this incredibly brave and personal piece of writing, Rowena states that:

“Losing your hair is one of the worst things that can happen to you as a woman. It [hair loss] robbed me of my confidence and self-esteem, and when I looked in the mirror I saw someone who looked not like me any more, but a cancer victim.”

Rowena’s account of her experience of losing her hair, in particular her statement that losing your hair is “one of the worst things that can happen to you as a woman,”  got me thinking about the relationship that women have with their hair, and about how the media seems to place great importance upon women’s hair as almost a badge of their femininity.

We only have to look around to see the importance that society places, and indeed appears to have always placed, on women’s hair. In certain religions, women cover their hair as a matter of modesty. In others, they don’t ever cut it. The fairytale of Rapunzel tells children of how long hair will attract a handsome prince. In history, women suspected of indecency have had their hair shaved to mark them as “bad.” There’s no two ways about it – long hair is obviously an indelible signifier of female beauty, morality and in some cases, sanity.
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Woman Arrested For Crashing Car While Shaving Pubes

Forget the rage against drinking and driving and the up-and-coming law against using your mobile while operating a vehicle; the newest trend is clearly shaving while driving and by “shaving” I mean “personal pubic grooming.”

A woman in Florida was arrested this past weekend after wrecking her car. The reason behind the accident?  She was grooming her nether regions. While driving.  On her way to meet her boyfriend.  Her ex-husband had taken the wheel while she stripped down and Bic-ed her button.

Thirty-seven year-old Florida resident Megan Barnes wrecked the car, crying “distraction!” and yet, shouldn’t have been driving to begin with.  Authorities state that the woman’s license had been suspended for previous counts of DUI and also driving with a suspended license.  When the crash was reported, Barnes’ ex-husband tried to take the rap for the crash, but was unsuccessful upon examination.  The passenger side airbags had deployed, burning the man, but the driver’s side airbags had not.  Guess who didn’t have airbag burns.
No word on whether the woman’s current boyfriend, ex-husband or estranged pubes posted her bail.

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