This just in*: Dr. Alan Hirsch, the Director of Chicago’s Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Center, says that Thanksgiving is the best time to get a man because, “the number one odor that enhanced penile blood flow was a combination of lavender and pumpkin pie.” In fact, pumpkin pie is the strongest stimulant of all smells tested, increasing penile blood flow 40 percent. Other runner-ups? Vanilla and strawberry. What can we glean from this news? Well, we’re basically all still five-year-olds, coloring with those smelly markers that were all …
… the rage. In all seriousness, it does seem that such smells seem to trigger feelings of calm and nostalgia, which is both cute and unsurprising.
Hold off, if cranberry sauce is your best dish; it increased blood flow only 2 percent, though no word on whether it made a difference if the stuff was canned or from scratch. But there is hope! Dr. Hirsch tells us that “nothing turns a man off.” And through the holiday season, with everyone worried about health and overeating and all that nonsense, it’s worth noting that pumpkin has a number of health benefits, especially the seeds, which are high in zinc and can increase testosterone.
Also, the best line in this article is “this Thanksgiving, if you want a little something extra to be thankful for, you may be able to create a big change in the bedroom by making a little change in the kitchen.” That’s a happy Thanksgiving.
*And by this just in, I mean probably every Thanksgiving this story resurfaces because this study is really old.