Feature
- Do You Hate Your Partner, Too?
- California Teen Avoids Heavy Sentencing by Passing the Buck
- Wanna Buy Your Teenager a Padded Push-Up Bra?
- Vampires in Texas!
- These Guys Are As Bad As Westboro Baptist Church
- Funny Letters Sent to Women's Magazines
- Women's Ski Jumping: Still Not a 'Real' Sport
- Will the World Be Pro-Choice Soon?
- Are We Getting Too Lazy to Even Divorce?
- Forever 21's Maternity Line: Glamorizing Teen Pregnancy?
Ladies and gentlemen and everyone in between, I’m happy to announce that there is at least one country in our world that is approaching the topic of sex and sexuality in the right way.
Let’s hear it for the Netherlands!!
An article was recently published by UMass exploring how Dutch parents approach their children’s developing sexuality, especially in their teenage years. Unlike most countries in the Western world, the overwhelming approach was to remove the concept of sex from political, religious, or other controversial realms and embrace it as something that is a natural aspect of teenage development.
As you probably already know, I am a huge advocate for sex positivity. De-mystifying topics of sex and sexuality is necessary if we want to prevent the spread of STIs and unfortunate cases of unplanned pregnancy. I appreciate this study, as it directly addresses this issue. I won’t quote the entire conclusion of the article here, but here are some of the main points that I find myself wholeheartedly agreeing with:
1. Acceptance of a teenager’s sex life provides them with an open environment in which they feel comfortable discussing issues of sex and sexuality (as opposed to being afraid to speak about sex and sexuality and ending up facing unforeseen consequences).
2. Having sex be a normal aspect of life can act as a barrier against gender stereotypes, such as girls being thought of as sluts and boys thinking that they must sleep with as many girls as possible to be “cool.”
3. Healthy, respectful relationships are more likely between teenagers when they have positive reinforcement of communication, openness, and commitment.
Overall, the main point I’m getting at here is that being open about sex and making it less taboo really encourages healthy sexual behaviors amongst teenagers (and really, everyone). Associating sex with shame, or things like politics and religion is really a recipe for disaster.
Damn. Too bad there’s not a World Cup for sex positivity. The Netherlands definitely would have won that.
You Might Also Like ...
-
-
5
Do they have sex ed programs in school too?
I read the original article and it struck a cord. I’ve always been very open about sex with my daughter. Her boyfriend has spent the night here and she’s spent the night at his dorm in college a few times. Partly it’s logistics. He goes to school in NoCal and we live in SoCal.
The other part is that she’s 18 (17 when this started) and she’s not stupid about sex.
Actually, she says they haven’t done anything that could get her pregnant but she’s pretty sure a nun would get in trouble for it. Hehe.
I believe her, because she has no reason to lie. I wouldn’t be concerned either way.
And I feel so much more peace as a parent having taught her what she needs to know and then not trying to own her sexuality.
In fact, the entire idea that parents think they have a right to interfere with an older adolescent’s sex life, as if they have possession of their children’s sexuality, totally icks me out.
Isn’t that a wonderful feeling knowing that you helped shape a wonderful intelligent young women? Great Job Mom. I firmly believe that if we took this approach with most subjects, we wouldn’t have some of the outlandish behavior that some kids partake in.
I support the Dutch 100%. Especially since going Dutch also means I pay for less failed dates!
This is exactly how I’m going to raise my kids.