Finally, a Good Men’s Magazine List About Sex

photo of sex tips for women sex tips for girls

Sometimes men’s magazines try to get into the minds of women. Most of the time, they are completely and utterly off base , while also making women sound like some subordinate species that must be made to feel like special little snowflakes if you ever want to have sex with them.

But, alas, I don’t get to complain today. Because men’s mag Esquire may be on the right track towards not-outright-wrong sex advice!

Their most recent article is called 10 Ways to Have Better Sex, According to Science. Let’s go through some of the list, shall we?

Tell her she looks (and tastes) great.

For this one, Esquire tells you that when you go down on your partner, you must be enthusiastic and not treat it like a chore. Holy crap. I can’t believe I’m reading …

… this in Esquire! I think this is great advice. There is still a stigma against goin’ down south of our female borders, so props for this one.

Use Your Ears

Ask what your partner wants in bed. And Listen. Wow! I hope my future lovers are reading this and taking it super seriously. Though it seems simple, telling people that they need to listen to their partners and discuss things with them is huge — a healthy relationship cannot function without communication. Awesome. They even advise to talk about bedroom stuff outside of the bedroom — in a place where you won’t get distracted in the heat of the moment.

Touch Her Everywhere (with oil)

Hey, I love massages. I’d even go as far to say I’m a bit of a massage junkie. Not everyone feels as I do, but I’m totally down with this snippet of advice. I also do think that physical contact all over the body is important — giving a massage or back rub is a great way to get to know what your partner likes, and it can create a relaxing environment.

Sit Back and Relax

Apparently this means that you should figure out what position is most stimulating for your female partner. Which is, in combination with the communication advice, well, pretty golden, in my opinion. (They mention the reverse cowgirl position. Try it. I dare you. Trust me.)

Don’t worry so much, intercourse isn’t everything

This is the one that did it for me. In a world where we are so focused on goal-oriented sex, I really, truly appreciate that a widely spread publication is taking a second to remind the masses that sexual activity isn’t all about actual intercourse. There shouldn’t be any pressure to perform in a healthy relationship.

So, props Esquire, for a pretty solid list. Of course, there are some things I could have done without (bring the kitchen into the bedroom? Eh. But that’s just my personal preferences), but overall, I say keep it up.



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6 thoughts on “Finally, a Good Men’s Magazine List About Sex

  1. I’m shocked. This all makes sense. There wasn’t even any mention of receiving blow jobs! It’s nice to read a sex list that will make both parties happy.

  2. Hmm… wonder what the other 5 were?

    And I hope they added the very important rule – Don’t expect sex as a reward for that lovely massage!

    While I do love a good massage, sometimes it gets me in the mood, and sometimes it makes me so relaxed I want to snuggle up and go to sleep. However, the guy that EXPECTS sex after a massage not only annoys me, but puts me off ever accepting another from him. Not. Good.

  3. “There wasn’t even any mention of receiving blow jobs!”
    ha ha, that is a pretty sad statement…
    I do not read “Mens magazines” or any main stream magazine(I read science/tech) but , shouldn’t an advice column about sex be about how to increase the chances of making your partner feel good? Not your yourself. You would think advice on oral sex in a mans magazine would be about the vagina not the penis. Something about the Venus butterfly. Almost seems like with how much they talk about it most men could give better blow jobs then women.
    ha ha, that also is a pretty sad statement…

  4. Pingback: Let’s Talk About Sex: The Netherlands Approach – Zelda Lily, Feminism in a Bra

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