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A woman went to try on clothes at an American Apparel store and when the 2x did not fit, she asked whether they have considered making more plus-size friendly clothes. The showroom rep said, “That’s not our demographic.”
Well. That’s interesting. Considering most of the population is not a size 6 – and that population needs to buy clothes – maybe it would be monetarily beneficial if you did consider making larger clothes? Just a thought. Oh, yeah, and lillianbehrendt agrees. That, too.
She writes on her fat acceptance blog:
“The current youth culture’s (or “hipster,” although I’m really annoyed by the ways people like to use that word against anyone in my age group) denouncement of fat people (at least in the fashion world) is not something I’m unfamiliar with. I remember the sad day in high school when I officially became “plus sized,” not as a day of “ew! I’m fat!” but as the death of my clothing options. No longer could I order clothes from Urban Outfitters or have any hope of finding something in a Los Angeles vintage or thrift store.
She continues by throwing the word “fascism” around:
“It’s funny that youth-centric companies like American Apparel are so fascist about the size of the women they’ll cater to, but are much more permissive when it comes to their male clientele. This is where I found the loophole through which I have been supporting a company that openly discriminates against people who look like me. I wear American Apparel men’s briefs. Almost exclusively. I probably have about 20 pairs. The picture of me on the About page? I’m wearing a purple acid-washed deep V-neck from American Apparel. I have lots of their deep V-neck shirts, not to mention a pair of suspenders, some dresses that are WAY TOO SMALL and two bowties. Not your demographic? Are you fucking KIDDING me?”
And she doesn’t stop there; she implores them to reconsider their bigoted stance:
“You know, it’s kind of pathetic that a company can be this shitty to me and still see my business. I wish I had the backbone to just say “fuck you” to American Apparel and be done with it, but I still find myself checking their website every few months with my fingers crossed, hoping to high heaven that they’ve seen the light and have started to make more things in my size.”
It’s hard not to have hurt feelings when a whole company says, “Sorry, we aren’t interested in you or your ‘abnormal’ body type.” But hopefully this negative publicity will help American Apparel get with the program and realize there are plenty of willing buyers if they want to ‘expand’ their business plan.
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What bothers me is that she keeps going back.
Agreed. It’s like begging the boyfriend who treats her like shit to take her back each and every time.
When you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship with a clothing store maybe something needs to change in your life.
I thought American Apparel were having financial issues now anyway? Surely it would be a good time to try and increase their potential customers. Although even though I’m in their ‘demographic’ I still think their clothes are fugly, so maybe they just need entirely new stock.
I only buy their tights. They last forever.
This is crap, so American apparel doesn’t have larger sizes. The world is lousy with stores just begging for her business. Granted there are more places geared toward “smaller” sizes, but there are still tons of places that cater to larger women. From my experience 90% of clothing stores are geared towards women, if even 5% of stores have plus sized lines that is still a lot of places. Not every place you go HAS to have what you want, suck it up, it is called shopping around. If you want a tale of woe try being a 6′2 230lb man who doesn’t want to dress like a lumberjack.
If a man that size can only find lumberjack clothing, a woman can often only find tents. While there are stores with plus-size lines, you don’t see much in the young demographic. And I suspect a plus-size 16-year-old doesn’t really want to dress like her grandmother.
then hey, here’s an idea…plus size 16 year old go on a freaking diet! I mean, we blame the stores for not having plus size, we blame mc donalds for selling fattie food, we blame everyone and everything except ourselves. I’m over this fat acceptance BS. that 16 year old is gonna be much happier and live a healthier life is she lost the weight-that is the reality of things. And if american aparell wants to make NORMAL size cloth for NORMAL size women then they have every right to. being overweight is not normal, and it is something you should work on not enable.
And if you read the rest of what I’ve said, I fully support their right as a private company to do whatever the hell they want.
I’m simply noting the facts of what is out there.
For a lot of people, stop eating, start moving, and lose the weight is a fair charge. But there *are* people with genuine issues not so easily controllable.
While stated in a rather offensive, abrasive manner… I kind of agree. And since when does being a size 2 make me an anti-feminist? Healthy habits are contagious, and it would do a world a good for obese people (even those who’s weight problems stem from some sort of genetic/thyroid disorder etc.) because changing diet and exercise habits actually rewires your brain/body chemistry, and releases tons of endorphins which are addictive and make you happy.
woah slow down there, I took that very offensive because some girls are actually overweight because of medication, an illness or a traumatic event. It’s not always in their own hands when their weight gets out of control. I know some amazing dancers that are chubby, and yet they train god knows how many hours a day. Some people are naturally thin and some are just naturally chubby. Please get that in your narrow minded head man.
While they do carry some decent simple staples, they also carry a lot of really awful stuff.
I don’t actually have much problem with this. It is a store’s right to decide what they want to carry. The head of AA would probably say that they don’t *want* to see their clothing on fat girls. (I base this assumption on his history of questionable and politically incorrect yet amazingly straightforward statements.)
And in fairness, considering there seems to be more spandex than cotton in that place, maybe there should be upper limits.
Why should they have to carry huge sizes? If they want that business model, they are more than entitled to it, even if it harms their business. If you’re plus sized, go to a store that carries your size.
Being an active and fit woman myself, I think that there is some reverse weight discrimination going on in America. I can’t even count how many times I have been accused of having an eating disorder by overweight people, when my weight is in a perfectly healthy range. Maybe I’m just insensitive, but I don’t think that size 22 should exist. Remember that many of these larger sizes were created recently to cope with America’s ever-expanding waistline.
“Maybe I’m just insensitive, but I don’t think that size 22 should exist. ”
Dee, it’s not insensitive to want fat people to be forced to walk around naked, it’s just unusual.
I mis-spoke… It shouldn’t have to exist. America’s obesity epidemic is a serious problem, and I don’t think it’s right to have this “accept fat people” thing shoved down our throats. I think people should be a bit more cognizant of how they are treating their bodies, because it’s not AA’s fault if you can’t fit.
I know you misspoke, I was being a smartass. It’s just a little bit more complex than a bunch of kids eating McDonalds all the time or a bunch of lazy people not exercising. There are lots of fat people who eat well, exercise and are still fat. Since ready to wear clothing is just about one hundred years old at this point, there’s no way to know how many size 22s there have been throughout history, but there have certainly always been fat people, and unless science figures out how to target the innumerable combinations of “fat genes,” there probably always will be.
Fat acceptance is about self-acceptance, not about trying to get you or American Apparel or whoever to accept us. Nothing is being shoved down your throat. We just want to be able to live our lives without hating ourselves for something that, statistically, is about as difficult to change (in a healthy, permanent way) as our eye color or height.
I think it’d be really cool if you and other people who are skeptical of fat acceptance to actually have some knowledge of the subject before you start criticizing it, but I won’t hold my breath.
But think how much healthier the US would be as a whole if people would just get off their asses and throw out the Big Mac. That is the reason that a lot of people are obese. Honestly, I think maybe everyone would be more accepting of bigger people if fast food and laziness weren’t so prevalent and therefore such a visible excuse.
god, there are some seriously insensitive people posting things here.
lillian, i think you said really wonderful things in a completely sensitive way. (not that it matters what i think). but kudos to you.
on the other side of things, i was so appalled by the comments of dee and others.
you cannot fucking judge unless you’ve been right there, walking in those shoes.
that is to say, you cannot fucking judge.
no one has the fucking right.
and especially when you have no idea at all about walking in those shoes. or have even seen a pair of those shoes! god.
dee i COMPLETLEY agree with you. being fat is not an epidemic, or a disease, it is a CHOICE. and yes, there probably are 0.01% of fat people that are obese due to thyroid problems or really fucked up genes-yet this is not the majority. if you eat a sensible diet and exercise constantly you wouldn’t be fat, that is a fact. and believe me, in the old old ages, let’s say caveman times, people weren’t obese because they were active (with catching their own food and all), throughout history there have been some obese people yet they have been mostly kings or priests with a lot of money and servants that did little physical activities all day and relied on their servants to stuff their faces. I am all for people to love their bodies but if you are fat then accept you are fat because you eat, because i bet if you ate salads, lean meats and fruits you wouldn’t weight as much as you do.
Are you Serious?
Im happy for you that you do not have a weight problem.
Look around you, I see more women/girls overweight
then underweight or average. I think it may depend on the area you live in. There’s this myth that all fat
people are just pigs who are lazy and overeat.
Theres more then one reason for people being overweight.
Im tired of the media potraying people who are overweight
as ugly. I happen to find a little extra more attractive then
thin. Different strokes you know.
Its a fact sizes 12- 14 sell out first.
Plus size models are size 10, when actual plus sizes start at 16. I want to know “WHO WILL LOVE PRECIOUS”
I do…
The fact that a lot of American women are fat does not make being fat any more healthy. In fact, with the numbers on obesity rates, it’s not surprising that the ‘average’ woman is overweight.
Size 12-14 would be a healthy weight on some endomorphic tall women, but not most of the people buying.
As for fat acceptance, how about simply accepting yourself as not your body? It is entirely possible to accept yourself as a worthwhile human being, WHILE admitting that you have a weight problem you could really stand to fix.
I hope my comment didn’t insinuate that I think all obese people are lazy and eat fast food all day. I was just contemplating how much healthier the US would be if every single person who is obese due to laziness+fast food stopped those unhealthy habits and were, as a result, not obese. We would be left with people who are larger only due to genetics/thyroid problems, and I think that this would actually increase acceptance of obesity as something other than the product of “gross and lazy habits.”
not that i’m the norm, but i’m a size 20(uk), with a bmi of 18. i’m VERY slim built,but a 20 none the less.
i know you were just speaking out about people with “ever-expanding waistlines” but plus size does not denote fat size, which people seem to treat it as.
if you take issue with people not treating their bodies right, that’s your choice(obviously) but i wanted to point out that attacking a size is discrimination as much as the “reverse weight discrimination” you mentioned
Note, however, that British sizes are totally different.
And certainly, SOME people are tall and thus wider. SOME people are just endomorphs. SOME people have thyroid issues, or reactions to various drugs for other issues.
But all those somes together account for a very small fraction of overweight or obese people.
Why be pissed? Take better care of your health; Eat right and the same or less calories than you can burn in a day; Exercise regularly; work out, walk around the block or go out dancing; stay away from beer and wine; have a active sex life.
You’ll l live longer, look better and you’ll be able to shop were ever the hell you want.
I’m thinking…
I live a few blocks from both an American Apparel and an Urban Outfitter. I do shop for tights and socks there, but most of the clothes are just ridiculous. Now, I’m a 34 year old college professor and not a 16 stick figure obsessed with Gossip Girl, but most of their clothes look like hooker-in-training meets a trapeze performer meets a ballerina. Weird shit. And not cheap. But I believe American Apparel boasts made in America clothes, something not a lot of clothiers can say. And I do have friends that are just that conscientious as to shop there solely for that reason. Luckily for me, my principles are relatively flexible and my checkbook is not.
Why does every store need to appeal to every single person? AA seems to be doing just fine–and don’t make me gag again by posting a “fat acceptance blog” as anything but fodder for criticism for ridicule. Go for a run, lardy, it makes a world of difference!
Lardy, HA!
She has the right to be whatever size she wants. BUT, if she wants to wear AA, then she is going to have to conform to their sizes, not the other way around.
Thanks for the website traffic, but some of your commenters are real arrogant cunts.
They really aren’t ours, Lillian.
They are just some random mean people.
You may keep them :)
A warning to all – intolerance by ignorant, mean spirited people will be treated as they deserve.
I wouldn’t really know where to put them. Sorry for assuming the trolls belonged to you.
Seriously, this women is ridiculous. In the beginning of the quotationed posted, she speaks of losing the ability to wear Urban Outfitters and cute vintage clothing as if someone cruelly ripped that option away from her. She got fucking fat, too fat to wear the brands and types of clothing she loves. Instead of mourning the loss of something she seemed to really enjoy she should have gotten off her ass, ate sensibly and exercised. Voila, back into your favorite clothing.
One of the arguments I keep hearing from these fat activists is that, “the average american women is a size 16″. Well, the average American women is fat. People are so scared of the word ‘fat’ that they have to hide behind these justifications and protest stores like AA. I don’t agree with everything Dov Charney does with his company but I do, however, feel like they don’t need to placate over weight America’s. It’s just not their responsibility to make everyone feel included. If you want to shop there so badly go on a diet, you don’t have to starve yourself, but eat healthy and exercise and you’ll be into a pair of mom butt skinny tweed pants in no time! If you don’t want to do that, then shut the fuck up about it and shop somewhere else. It will save you the personal anguish of not fitting into the clothing they have and making dumb shit statements about it AND it will save me the time I just waisted getting annoyed and writing all of the bullshit I felt compelled to write. Thanks!
I agree with you that’s it’s a person’s own fault when he or she gains too much weight to shop somewhere. There are more than enough stores where one kind find all number of sizes. But it’s no one’s fault but your own that you “waisted” your time posting such angry, hurtful comments.
Fair enough, I didn’t proof read… but the misspelling is kinda funny given the topic. Oh well.
Can’t argue there :)
I cannot wait for you sanctimonious bitches to go through menopause.
Try keeping weight off then.
Pure joy, I tell you.
I have never had too much trouble with weight, despite 5 pregnancies and 5 c sections. Then I hit menopause.
Oh, the joy.
I have had to increase my exercise from a daily 3 mile brisk walk by adding 2 cardio kick boxing classes, 2 pilates and one zumba class per week.
Karma is gonna bite your ass.
Er… not to be a bitch, and I’m sure it is hard to keep weight off during menopause, but I don’t think American Apparel wants to cater to 50+ year old women. This is the store that is queen of all things lace and spandex…
you mean “queen of all things tacky and cheap.” it’s not only 50+ year-old women who don’t want to shop there; it’s anyone with fashion sense, really. tacky, tacky, tacky.
Trust me, Cynthia.
I have way more money than the young kids, and I look better than a lot of them as well.
I am absolutely positive that AA would cheerfully take any cash that I threw at them.
I have an extensive wardrobe – none of it AA. I also have 2 teen daughters who wouldn’t be caught dead in “over-priced hooker get ups” – as my 18 year old calls them.
I’m very happy that my kids have taste and class.
Blurry, I think some of this young uns forget what some 50 year old women can look like! As I’ve said many a time…..I wish someone would have told me what older age can be like! Proud that I can pass as my son’s wife, but hell this tired body can give me fits sometimes.
**crap, I better start proofreading my comments. I’ve been super busy lately and talk about spelling and grammar errors!
Oh, I never said I owned American Apparel clothes or liked their style. I think they’re overpriced and (with the exception of their basic T’s, sweaters, etc.) would look strange anywhere outside of a dance studio or an eighties themed high school rave. But they have a brand image, and that image isn’t of a menopausal-age woman – not that those women can’t wear AA clothes, just that they probably aren’t the people that AA is thinking of when they design their clothing. Which is OK. Every store has a target group (see my post below).
Wow.. you are such a mean spiritred HATER.
What happened to you?
Did some chubby kid steal your lunch money in 3rd grade
and from that day forward you decided to bash all chubbies.
I think you need a HUG.
So between their sexual predator of a CEO and refusing to MAKE MONEY by catering to larger sizes, I think we can all see what a winner this company is.
I tend to fluctuate between tiny and normal sized, and I’ve gotta say, the medium sized dresses I have from American Apparel barely fit me at my tiniest (which is an extra small in any other brand!). Wearing their clothes when I’m bigger? Hell no, they’re so unflattering to larger sizes, even if you go a size or two up. I think it’s all the spandex they use.
Expanding your customer base by drastically altering your image doesn’t necessarily = more money. They have a very specific brand built up, and, to put it bluntly, that brand is “No Fat Chicks.”
Every store doesn’t need to cater to every person–we don’t need every shop to become a Wal*Mart, do we? This is like demanding KFC start serving sushi and paté.
Like the bumper sticker!
I shop at AA and I’m what is considered ‘plus size’. (to note: I eat healthier than most ‘thin’ people I know and I work out 3 to 4 times a week. Shocking, right??) I love their t-shirts and wear them often. There is no way I could fit into what they call ‘XL’ in a women’s size, so I always buy the Unisex shirts. Yes, some of the dresses are cute but I know I’d never fit into one. It’s just something I accept. It’s an unfortunate fact of their ‘target demographic’. But, I also see both sides of the issue here. I want to wear cute clothes. Thus, I shop elsewhere to supplement my wardrobe. I don’t care. I’m 43 and curvy. If I wanna be a size 4, I’ll starve myself and exercise 7 days a week. Even then, I doubt I’d want to wear half the crap they sell anyway. It’s a throw back to disco lycra spandex shit that never looked good on anyone.
p.s. For anyone that thinks exercising regularly and eating healthy is magically going to make you thin obviously hasn’t hit 40 yet. Just wait.
Maybe I’m missing the point, but American Apparel isn’t for older people anyway… they sell spandex bodysuits for f’s sake!! I’m 24 and feel too old to wear most of that crap. I understand it’s tough to not be able to shop at a store you like, but honestly, everyone can’t cater to you. I’m 5′9″ and all the cutest shoes are SUPER tall and it makes me uncomfortable to be that tall – doesn’t mean I’m demanding they start making them all 2 inches or less!
As for the weight issue, I’m tired of the old genetics excuse – I’m not counting menopause, a genuine thyroid disease, etc. I went to college in the Midwest and everyone is fat b/c they eat fast food everyday. End of story! No one is accountable for themselves anymore and we will end up paying for their heart medication (thanks Obama….) b/c Big Macs clogged all their arteries. Sweet!
Im so sorry you had to deal with fat people at school.
How do you think we should get rid of them?
A private island maybe or do you think theyd eat it?
I dont shop at American Apparel anyway, in fact I havent even been inside one. I just felt bad so many people were Hating. The media gets people to hate certain groups .. ie smokers, overweight, . tea party movement …
Other then a airplane, whats the problem ?
Are you really afraid of insurance rates going up for people being overweight? How about drinkers, or pot smokers,
or people who have many sexual partners?
Dont single out one group, we all have at least one
bad habit. You might be correct about takining ownership,
but have you consdiered nerves, or depression?
Theres all whole host of reasons why people are overweight.
The most likedly on is not being active enough in this everything at our fingertips generation.
Will you at admitt you know at least one person
who eats and eats and never gets fat?
I bet you know one
Is that just luck?
Can it be reverse?
……………
Sorry I’ve been out of town for Memorial Day and just saw your response – surprisingly I actually know a couple of people that eat and eat and are naturally petite and small (hate them!). There are definitely lots of factors that contribute to obesity and I mentioned the Midwest b/c of accountability. I didn’t mean to sound like I was bashing them – I’m a Libertarian, so whatever someone wants to do to themselves is OK by me (as long as it doesn’t affect others, like smoking while pregnant, etc).
Anyway, the overall point I was trying to make was that you just can’t cater to everyone all the time
I don’t understand all the anger the article seems to be written with. Clothing stores generally have certain demographics that they cater to, that’s just a fact. You can’t expect every store to please everyone.
I’m tiny and short and have no curves whatsoever (seriously – not even an A cup), which means I’m unable to pull off a ton of fashion trends (nothing strapless, ever!) and that I’m a size smaller than the smallest size that some stores carry (like department stores). I think bikini/bra shopping when you are as curveless as me is a way bigger bitch than finding larger clothing. But I don’t expect every store I go into to have clothes that fit me. And I don’t call plus-sized stores fascist or discriminatory, or say that they are treating me like shit, or that they have a superiority complex.
I promise you, EVERYONE has had the experience of wanting an item of clothing and not having their size available. So it happens more when you’re larger and you want American Apparel. Same thing would happen if I wanted something from Torrid. Life isn’t perfect.
I don’t know why anyone is surprised by this. Their creepy owner likes to jerk off in front of his young female staff, and their ads look like a post-roofie date rape scene. Women aren’t people to this guy, so I think that, if you’re basically not in “his” demographic (ie, a girl he wants to have sex with) then you might as well not exist.
[...] American Apparel to “Fat” Girls: You Are Not 'Our Demographic … [...]
I’m going to order a pizza.
WOW, Awesome descussion…
So in conclusion Fat chicks don’t like to be called “Fat” chicks.
Look alot of guys these days don’t care if you not a size 6 or smaller. But really if it bothers you that much eat a salad once in a while.
And Fuck’em shop some wear else, that carried your size.
You can’t buy jeans at Men’s Wearhouse, so I don’t go there looking for them.
I’m thinking
Hahaha male purrrspective u crack me up. What you are saying is truth-you just have so many spelling mistakes it’s hard to take it seriously.
Just saying
my mom just hit menopause, she’s 51 and she is a size 6. i think she did not balloon, like some other women do, because all her life she has been a size 4-6. if you eat healthy throughout your life and exercise (although she rarely exercises) you wont put as much weight on when you grow old. having said that i understand that genes play a big part in your weight fluctuation when you hit menopause (not that much before, when you are young and you can shed the weight much more easily). my boyfriends mom eats really healthy and does a lot of exercise yet she is fat, not obese, but fat and 60-hope our kids get my genes.
Vera, I am very happy for your mom.
BUT you are presenting a specious argument at best.
You can’t say that a LIFE LONG habit of exercise and healthy diet will save you from weight gain during menopause, then hold your mom up as an example of staying thin, but add that she “rarely exercises”.
Make up your mind or admit that you made my point for me. That is – everyone is different. Some people struggle, some people don’t. It is hardly all diet and exercise and you have to be an uneducated lout to think otherwise.
Just to clear this up – I am not an endocrinologist. I have taken several diet & nutrition therapy classes at the university level.
I am also very certain that the majority of people commenting here are not endocrinologist either.
They just play one on the internet.
I can’t speak for every fat girl out there, so I’ll only speak for myself. I’m obese. I’ve been fat since I was 6 years old, and I can’t blame my parents because they fought for me to eat healthy.
Being fat is not easy, it is usually not a choice. As I grew up there was a bit of a strange attitude at home towards food, my mother lived on salads, my father on grease (it didn’t mean he wanted me to eat as greasy, but it was available at home), my sister on sugar free food since she was diabetic. Every time I went to get a bite to eat my father would make a sarky remark, I felt uncomfortable; so I started sneaking for food, even if it had to be in the middle of the night. I’m not saying it’s not my fault, but something small and silly triggered a stupid compulsive eating disorder.
In my early teens I started really feeling bad about my looks, started dieting all the time, tried to get help from nutritionists, but as many others, since the results were not fast enough, I always gave up! food made me happy, I was unhappy when I didn’t eat what I wanted.
In my late teens I felt desperate, I decided to simply not eat. I went from one extreme to the other, the sight of food made me want to run away from it as if it were some kind of demon, and got to what you call a very “healthy weight”. The problem is that I was anything but healthy, I had destroyed my immune system. I thought I looked good, but one day a guy I barely knew said I could lose a few pounds.
I was insanely obsessed with my look, and ignored the fact that he was into girls size 0 (exhibit A: his girlfriend). This little comment not meant to be hurtful threw me back into a “I give up” state.
Shortly after, I left my parent’s house, I moved in with my boyfriend. Oh the freedom to eat what we wanted, pizza, ice cream for diner, we went a bit crazy! We were deeply in love (and still are), overweight or not. We didn’t feel we had to look our best for each other. I started to put on the fast lost pounds.
I spent 2 years unemployed in my early twenties, I stayed at home doing well… nothing. I didn’t eat like a cow, but slowly the weight continued to increased. I avoided mirrors, I couldn’t recognize myself.
Then finally I got a great job, started moving again. That is when I noticed I could barely walk without having trouble breathing, even sitting down I was gasping for air; I felt nauseous constantly. I weighted 275 pounds! I went to the doctor for help: Sky rocket high blood pressure, diabetes, heart attack waiting for me.
He put me on medication to help me not feel hunger. It was great! everything was going well, I was exercising every day, ate almost exclusively fruit and salad because I didn’t feel any “needs” for food, and ate only because I knew I had to. Then I went to a endocrinologist for my diabetes, he took me off that medication because it was too aggressive. The truth is, it was, it increased even more my blood pressure to the point I felt I was dying every evening. But only for the first 2 weeks, after that I felt great.
I thought that even without the medication everything would still be fine, it felt easy! I was oh so mistaken. I started feeling so hungry, all the time. It wasn’t just cravings, I really felt as if I had a giant hole in my stomach. The weight started coming back, but really slowly this time.
I refuse to go back to not being able to walk and breathe right, I started little diets often since then. My weight does not increase, I am quite active, but I still don’t eat what I should.
Everyday I think “I’m going to eat well today” but keep on making little mistakes. I’m not a fan of junk food, it’s more things like cheese and bread, cereals, pasta. The weight is not getting worse, but it’s not getting better: 230 pounds. Still way too much. My boyfriends wants to lose weight also, but he lacks the self control just as much as me.
In conclusion, I am not a Mac Donald’s addict, I do walk 2h every day, the problem is a history of bad behavior that made the present much more difficult because I have a lot of pounds to lose, I have bad habits and a stupid brain that holds on to them.
This is the story of a fat girl, who is not happy about it and would like to defeat the fluffy monster. It is never as simple as it seems. Indeed please don’t judge if you haven’t walked in those shoes, it’s not a happy place. I’s obsessive, compulsive, and makes you sad that you can’t let yourself be the person you want to be.
About the clothes, there is only one store that had my size and is not for grandmas: H&M. The problem is that many times those sizes go first. And you know what, I’m thankful that they have those sizes, I don’t think I’m entitled to it. I would be more thankful of course if more stores had them, but I don’t blame them. I only wish they would stock more at H&M, hehe.
I’m sorry for the long post, I never wrote this story anywhere, and with all the fat people hate everywhere, I felt it was time to explain the fluffy side of the story.
Laura, in this life you are going to find many people who are willing to put you down. If it isn’t for weight, it’ll be for your race, religion, because you’re a blond, etc.
The thing that you have to remember is love yourself.
These people don’t. They can only feel good about themselves if they make others feel bad.
Basic psychology. Some of them may never grow up and get it. The positive side is that you can change simply by acknowledging that you want to live and do what you need to do to live happily. A size 0 is a piss poor goal, perhaps a size 14 is as well. Aim for healthy, aim for happy.
Peace to you.
I know what you mean. I was anorexic in high school (combination of needing to feel in control, hating where I lived, and a jackass boyfriend and I’m still ashamed that I let him get to me like that) and graduated weighing 100 pounds. I lost a track scholarship because I was so sickly. My metabolism is still jacked (as in non-existent) and the fact that I’m on lithium has caused me to go up to a size 14 (at 5 foot 4). Like you, I don’t eat fast food (put down the Big Mac is such a lame statement, as if that’s the only problem), I go for 1-2 hour walks every day, and while I’m not losing weight, I’m not gaining it and when I went to the doc last, I am super healthy: excellent blood pressure, excellent cholesterol, sugar levels, on and on. So I look “fat” but I’m actually quite healthy and given my history with anorexia, no one is pushing me to lose weight.
But I’m not sure anyone other than those recovering from EDs can understand just how much your metabolism suffers.
Thank you for sharing your story.
I wondered what kind of negative reaction I would
get after my comments last night.
I was glad to see your post.
I was so annoyed at all the small minded HATERS.
The only person that matters is you.
What I fail to realize is why
people feel the need to rain all over someone parade.
What difference does it make to them what others
look like, its not them?
I know this girl who overweight.
Everyone would tease her even her friends.
Her father even use to make jokes at her expense.
Her parents put her on a diet and would make her
weigh in every week.
Long story short she tried to end her life.
Her parents are jerks and I feel so sorry for her.
Now say shes walking along minding her own
and one of these HATERS comes along and makes
a rude comment, or laughs at her?
I wish people would think before they open their mouths.
Anyway I went off on a rant lol
Thanks for sharing =)~
I hear a lot of stories about lifelong eating problems sparked by constant comments from parents. I think it’s so sad that a parent’s stupidity can ruin potentially ruin their child’s happiness. Thanks for sharing your story :)
Thank you all for you comments, I admit I got a little nervous after posting mine. As I’ve said, I never told anyone the whole story this way.
It’s funny, people really do have such a strong effect on others. Jeneria, I also had an abusive boyfriend at the time I got really crazy on the starving myself; he would always make me feel uncomfortable, told me that he hated skinny girls and that he would leave me as soon as he started seing my bones, then told me I had a huge butt and should work out. I would have to lower myself and act as his sex slave just to have the honor of having his company.
At 17 was my first boyfriend, and sometimes we don’t realize that yes, there is better out there, the first won’t be the last and is not the only man who will ever be interested in you.
At that time even if I didn’t eat for 3 days and went for the fridge at home I’d still get the jokes about me always eating. Once again, I should have been stronger than that, but I know it affected me because I still have a very very clear picture in my mind of all those words.
Yesterday while shopping for food with my boyfriend I suddenly noticed that for every item I wanted to buy, I asked him “can we buy this please”. Apparently I always do that, and I didn’t know! Such strange behavior had become normal for me, and I don’t think he notices it anymore either.
I have no idea why we get a bit crazy with our food, but it is a fact that it can start controlling your life. And I promise myself everyday that even if today is not going well, I’ll never give up trying and hoping.
Thank you all for such nice comments, you have no idea how much it helps.
Not to mention the damaging habits from “you have to finish everything on your plate”. Or “there are starving children in Africa – eat your food”.
Now, I agree with “eat your veggies first”, but the belief that you need to finish everything turns people into chowers who must get through all of a restaurant meal so it isn’t ‘wasted’.
A big thing for me was reading the following general statement:
“if you’re not hungry anymore, it’s all garbage. If you can save it for tomorrow, great. But if you can’t save it, it’s garbage whether it goes into the trash, or into your body. You won’t help anything by putting the garbage down your throat”.
I often make large amounts of food at a time, and pack most away for future meals, and I’m all for leftovers.
But if it’s a matter of eat it or throw it out, it’s not morally better to eat it. Once the hunger is satiated, all I’m doing is hurting myself by trying to finish the plate.
I’m sure this has already been done and written about, but has a size 6er ever sued Lane Bryant for discrimination?
haha if they did it would be pretty ridiculous. what do they have at lane bryant they don’t have that’s better-made and looks better at other stores? The size 6 person has plenty of other options.
Not that Im aware of : but since you brought it up
check this out.
Plus size Lane Bryant lingerie ad banned by Fox and ABC, is it too racy?
Lane Bryant released a sexy new lingerie ad that features a voluptuous plus size model in bra and panties as she gets ready for a date. The commercial advertises Lane Bryant’s line of lingerie: Cacique, only Fox and ABC chose not to air the commercial. Now Lane Bryant is citing discrimination against full figured models and a controversy has ensued. Is the ad too racy?
Though the ad is sexy, it is similar to Victoria Secret ads that air regularly on television except for one noticeable difference: size! Lane Bryant uses a beautiful plus sized model, Ashley Graham, whose bust is noticeably larger than those depicted in Victoria Secret and other lingerie ads. Is this what caused Fox and ABC to ban the commercials?
Here ya go:
Lane Bryant Ad
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VMxyZQfMmM4
Victoria’s Secret – 2010
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmNEG8IFd_Y
Im sure some small minded Haters will come back with some smug remark.
There was also photos of a plus sized model in V mag.
which people were all up in arms about.
Dont let the masses get use to seeing some meat
on bones, remember were pushing walking skeltons.
American women are no all fat, not anywhere else are there
heavy women? There are heavy women AND MEN all over the globe, thats just the media again brainwashing the simple dronez. Heres what I dont get if my cousin, the guy next door, or my co worker is fat what difference does it make in my life? Women are especially hard on other WOMEN. so terrible and critical.
Maybe you missed it, but plus size models and pinup girls
is very Hot right now.
Theres plenty of fetish plus sized models
I happen to find some of them Darn Sexy
and maybe to your suprise lots of men do too.
You have the internet LOOK.
See them, see the hundreds and thousands of men
who find them attractive. Are we so afraid something
else might be SEXY besides the norm?
Me personally I dont follow trends or what the majority shoves down my throat. I have my own ideas.
I remember hearing about this. It seems pretty ridiculous, because Victoria’s Secret ads have always been pretty racy; I’m not sure how Lane Bryant could top them.
On another note, though, I hear a lot of criticism of VS models as skeletal. I think it’s motivated by envy for the most part, because while VS models are thin, they’ve also got some body fat and some fantastic curves (fake or not). Hell, I would love to look like a VS model, but I realize it’s not plausible. I’ve always thought they look far more human than runway models.
Btw, why do you capitalize Haters?
Its not that I dont think some victorias secret models
are pretty, I do.
It’s just theres beauty in alot different people.
Who gets to define what beautiful is, Tv, movies, Cosmo ….?
What the majority find attractive has changed over the years
people who were once viewed Sexy are now ok looking. Most people in the public eye have perfect teeth, and perfect hair, long eyelashes, and big breasts. Trust me I make a living making other people look beautiful, sometimes they are sometimes its just a illusion. Theres alot of tricks to the trade. Hair extentions, hair pieces, wigs, falsh eyelashes, hair color, makeup, body tanner, padding, and shading body parts, while highlighting others. Then after all of that theres airbrushing. Not to mention the strict diets, the endless hours of exercise. I just see to many people who compare
themselves to fantasy. Its a full time job plus a team of trained professionals to be that perfect.
Why compare yourself to fantasy, to me its like comparing yourself to Jessica Rabbit.
Im running on here, but did you see “Little Miss Sunshine”
In the movie shes not your average kid, shes kindy chubby, she wears glasses, and isnt the best dresser
My parents watched the movie, and they did not get why
she shouldnt be in a beauty contest, my father said ” you mean because she wears glasses” there from a different generation. What’s wrong with her I replied, “she doesnt look like everyone else”.
How about this, guys: I’m fat. I’m fat because I eat way too much delicious, well-made food. I’m otherwise healthy and active and I accept that my weight and size are because of the choices I make every day. I don’t mind; I think I’m pretty good-looking. You know what else? I like to wear tight clothes and mini-dresses, and I don’t give a fuck if people are grossed out by my jiggly parts, because I’m not wearing it for them. So how about that? How about I want to live the way I want to live and look the way I want to look and still wear what I want to wear?
Look, the whole thing about companies and labels not having larger sizes because they don’t want their clothes seen on fat people is pretty offensive. They’re essentially saying that we are less valuable than thin people. That’s why it’s offensive to tell fat people that they should just lose weight to fit into the clothes instead of the companies making the clothes larger.
I mean, I’m stretching the comparison a bit here, but isn’t it a bit like telling gay people to just “change their lifestyle” instead of giving them their rights? I mean, it’s so unhealthy being gay, what with all the AIDS and suicide and hate crime! C’mon, guys. Really.
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