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VERY IMPORTANT BREAKING NEWS!
OUR HIGH-SCHOOLERS ARE HUGGING EACH OTHER!
A piece in the New York Times this week tackles the tough issues our teenagers face today, like navigating the halls of their public schools when they’re packed with drug dealers huggers. The phenomenon of teenage hugging has truly brought the nation to a standstill.
“We’re not afraid, we just get in and hug,” said Danny Schneider, a junior at the school, where hallway hugging began shortly after 7 a.m. on a recent morning as students arrived. “The guy friends, we don’t care. You just get right in there and jump in.”
There are romantic hugs, too, but that is not what these teenagers are talking about.
Girls embracing girls, girls embracing boys, boys embracing each other — the hug has become the favorite social greeting when teenagers meet or part these days. Teachers joke about “one hour” and “six hour” hugs, saying that students hug one another all day as if they were separated for the entire summer.
A measure of how rapidly the ritual is spreading is that some students complain of peer pressure to hug to fit in. And schools from Hillsdale, N.J., to Bend, Ore., wary in a litigious era about sexual harassment or improper touching — or citing hallway clogging and late arrivals to class — have banned hugging or imposed a three-second rule.
Jesus Christ. Is there anything these poor teenage kids can do right? I, for one, LOVE hugs. I hug everybody. I hug people who don’t like being hugged. There’s something sacred and valuable in the human embrace, a life-force that transfers when skin lays against skin, and I can never get enough hugs. A ban on hugs is about as ridiculous as it gets.
If anything, though, seeing schools crack down on these vicious swine hugs will encourage these kids to do even more hugging. And if teens can satisfy their sense of rebellion by hugging one another, I think we have a victory on our hands. Hug away, kids! FUCK THE MAN!
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“Hug it out, bitches”
Jeez they will flip out about kids doing anything other than keeping their heads down and learning. Heaven forbid they find positive affection amongst their peers.
I hug almost all of my friends whenever I see them. It’s a lot more personal than a lame high-five or the outdated ‘pound it.’ I guess I’m just stickin it to the man!
I’m all for hugging and think it’s terrific that high-school students (of which I am one) are doing something so positive and supportive of one another. I cannot resist, however, pointing out that it should be “when skin LIES against skin” rather than “lays” because lays is a transitive verb and therefore needs a direct object. i suppose, though, the skin could be LAYING goodwill and kindness on another person, so it could work! :)
Teenagers need hugs so bad!
True that.
Yes they do!
More hugs could possibly lead to less teenagers that feel the need to go in and shoot up their peers.
…unless they get tired of the hugging, then things could prove problematic.
And once again, in trying to fight off a very real problem (sexual harassment), the powers that be make some half-assed measure that completely misses the mark and bans a GOOD THING and thereby invites dumbasses to adopt even more dismissive attitudes about said very real problem. Nice going.
brb, losing faith in humanity.
Really. This is totally harmless. The schools ought to focus on why American kids are so far behind the Europeans educationally and give the PC shit a rest. Do away with multiple choice tests and condoms on bananas and let’s focus on bringing kids up to speed in math and science. If kids want to learn about sex stuff they can find that on the internet so I don’t know why schools waste time and money on useless crap like that.
When I was in secondary school in the UK (last year lol, in 1st year uni now) we ALWAYS hugged our friends!… Pretty much all teenagers hug (unless they’re not a “hugging” person) and I’ve never heard it brought up as an issue. How strange. Sometimes US and UK societies are so similar, differences like this just perplex me.
HUGGING IS GOOD FOR THE SOUL!
In the words of one of my favorite bands “handshakes are for strangers, around here we hug.”